“Do Not Follow Divorce Women As Your Friend” — Pastor Ibiyeomie’s Wife Drops Mother’s Day Bombshell That Has Nigerians Talking

Akahi News learnt that Pastor Peace Ibiyeomie, wife of renowned clergy Pastor David Ibiyeomie of Salvation Ministries, has stirred a fierce debate after cautioning married women against forming close friendships with divorced women during a Mother’s Day service in Rivers State.

Her remarks, which quickly went viral, advised married women to handle relationships with divorced women carefully. Akahi News gathered that the clergyman’s wife alleged that some divorced women tend to speak negatively about marriage while still engaging in romantic relationships with men in secret — a contradiction she described as dangerous to the marriages of those who listen to them.

It was alleged that her comments have divided Christians across Nigeria, with some praising her for “speaking the truth” while others accuse her of stigmatising divorced women who may have left abusive or broken marriages through no fault of their own.

“Do Not Follow A Divorcee As Your Friend” — The Full Message

Pastor Peace delivered the advice during the Mother’s Day celebration at the church’s headquarters in Rivers State. Her tone was direct, her message unambiguous. “Do not follow a divorcee as your friend, even if she is your sister. Teach her, either she reconciles with her husband, or she remarries,” she said.

She then offered a startling characterisation of some divorced women: “She will tell you that men are not important, but meanwhile, she goes behind your back to have affairs with men. I have seen so many examples of single ladies.”

Akahi News had earlier reported that similar warnings have been issued by other pastors’ wives over the years, but few have been as direct as Pastor Peace. She went on to reveal that some single women had confessed to her that they secretly date men even while publicly claiming that men are “not important.”

“One opened up so much to me, that is why she wants to remarry,” she added, suggesting that the anti-marriage rhetoric some women project is not a true reflection of their private desires.

She questioned the inconsistency: “They keep saying the man is not important. If he is not important, why are you sleeping with him? So stay on your own if you say a man is not important.”

Her most potent warning, however, was this: “That your marriage is broken does not mean you should break another person’s marriage.” Then came the parting counsel: “Therefore, the company you keep will either lift you up or pull you down. Leave a meaningful legacy that you will be remembered for.”

But here is the philosophical reflection that must accompany this sermon: is every divorced woman a threat to marriage? And is the responsibility for marital stability really placed on avoiding certain friendships rather than on building communication, trust, and conflict resolution skills within the marriage itself?

Mixed Reactions: “Truth” Versus “Stigmatisation”

The response to Pastor Peace’s message has been as divided as the Nigerian internet can produce. On one side, many married women — particularly those in conservative Christian circles — have applauded her for calling out what they see as a genuine danger. “Some divorced women are bitter and they will pour that bitterness into your ears until you也开始 hate your husband,” one commenter wrote on social media.

Others, however, have accused Pastor Peace of painting all divorced women with the same brush. “What about women who were abused? What about women whose husbands abandoned them? Are they also agents of destruction?” asked a Facebook user. Another added: “This is why the church is losing relevance. Instead of helping divorced women heal, they ostracise them.”

Pastor Peace’s defenders argue that she specifically referred to divorced women who speak against marriage while secretly dating — not every divorced woman. Her critics counter that the warning as delivered — “Do not follow a divorcee as your friend” — is blanket and therefore harmful.

Consider the divorced woman in Port Harcourt who attends Salvation Ministries faithfully. She did not want her marriage to end. She prayed, she fasted, she sought counselling. But her husband was physically abusive, and she had to leave to save her life. She reads Pastor Peace’s words and feels judged. Her church, which should be a refuge, now feels like a courtroom.

Or think of the married woman in Lagos who has a divorced best friend. That friend has supported her through thick and thin — helped her when her husband lost his job, babysat her children, prayed with her during illness. She hears Pastor Peace’s warning and must now decide: obey her pastor’s wife or defend her friendship? It is not a simple choice.

It is not a child’s play, this business of marriage and friendship. The Bible itself is filled with divorced people — including, some scholars argue, the woman at the well who had five husbands. Jesus did not shun her. He engaged her. He offered her living water. He did not warn his disciples to avoid her company.

That said, Pastor Peace is not entirely wrong that some people — married or divorced — project their pain onto others in unhealthy ways. A woman who has been deeply hurt by a man may indeed develop a cynical view of men and marriage. If she then becomes a close confidante to a married woman, her cynicism could influence her friend’s perception of her own husband — especially if that marriage is already struggling.

The issue is not whether divorced women can be bad influences. The issue is whether they should be categorically excluded from friendship circles as a matter of pastoral instruction. Wisdom suggests nuance. Discernment. Case-by-case evaluation. The same Bible that warns about bad company also commands believers to bear one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2).

Perhaps the healthiest approach is neither blanket acceptance nor blanket rejection. Married women should be wise about whose counsel they receive. But divorced women should also be welcomed into the church as full members who need healing, hope, and healthy friendships — not as lepers to be avoided.

Pastor Peace’s heart may be to protect marriages. That is commendable. But the method must be examined. Stigma does not heal. Exclusion does not restore. And the gospel of Jesus Christ has always been good news for the broken — including the divorced.

📌 Fact Summary Box

Speaker: Pastor Peace Ibiyeomie (wife of Pastor David Ibiyeomie, Salvation Ministries, Rivers State).

Occasion: Mother’s Day service.

Location: Salvation Ministries, Rivers State.

Key warning: “Do not follow a divorcee as your friend, even if she is your sister.”

Reason given: Some divorced women speak negatively about men/marriage while secretly dating men.

Alternative counsel: Teach divorced women to reconcile with ex-husbands or remarry.

Key quote 1: “If he is not important, why are you sleeping with him?”

Key quote 2: “That your marriage is broken does not mean you should break another person’s marriage.”

Key quote 3: “The company you keep will either lift you up or pull you down.”

Reactions: Mixed — praise for “speaking truth” versus criticism for stigmatising divorced women.

Context: Similar warnings from pastors’ wives have sparked debate before.

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Akahi News will continue tracking this developing conversation and all stories affecting Nigerian marriages, families, and faith communities. Stay with us. Stay discerning. And remember: wisdom is not about blanket rules — it is about seeing each person as God sees them, wounds and all.